The taste of candy is different from that of voluntary candy.
I saw a video on Douyin and I was impressed.
on Valentine's Day, boys ask girls:
"do you want the bag you like?"
"do you want your favorite lipstick?"
"do you want to send you a red packet?"
then a flower girl came up and said, "Sir, buy a flower for your girlfriend."
the girl happily wanted to take the rose handed over by the flower girl, but the boy pushed it and said, "Oh, no."
in the comments section, the most liked message goes like this:
"details become very cheap when I say you do it; if I say you don't do it, I become very cheap." You know, the taste of candy is different from that of voluntary candy. "
indeed, in the emotional world, to reach out and take the initiative to give are two different things.
A person really loves you and won't ask you if you want it or not, just for fear that what you give is not good enough. On the contrary, if you mention it and ask for it, the meaning will be different.
so, no matter how deep the relationship is, no matter how good the relationship is, don't stretch out your hand to ask for these three things. after all, it is not the will that comes, but willingness is the proof of sincerity!
there is a topic on the Internet: what are the reasons that you don't understand until you get married?
among the various answers, the most popular sentence is: "Love and bread, do not reach for."
this sentence may speak to the hearts of many people, those who reach out to love, in the end, most of them are black and blue.
backstage, there is a reader Xiaolian, who once talked to me about her marriage story, and she didn't feel sad.
Xiaolian and her husband met during docking work, and Xiaolian fell at the first sight of each other.
she learned the online routines of "women chasing men, interlayer gauze", sending greetings to each other every now and then, and asking them out for dinner.
but the other party didn't call her very much, and they didn't pay enough attention to chatting and meeting each other, but they just didn't refuse clearly, giving Xiaolian the possibility to continue.
before she got married, Xiaolian felt that her affection for him would impress him sooner or later, and even thought that it would be fine after marriage, and that men were slow to heat up.
later, when they got pregnant unexpectedly, the two naturally registered, and they didn't even have time for the wedding.
during pregnancy, her husband is still lukewarm to her, and she still has fantasies about becoming a father. Man
are late ripening.
until the baby was born, her husband was not surprised and still didn't care about anything. Xiaolian got up every night to nurse
she is responsible for changing diapers, even washing and cooking.
Xiaolian is like a single mother, who wants to be both a "father" and a "mother", while the person she loves is always high above, and even treats her as a servant, often talking about divorce.
the humblest sentence in the world is probably: "what's wrong with me? tell me, can't I change it?"
knowing that "a twisted melon is not sweet", he talks hard to quench his thirst.
it's just that love, which is asked for and deliberately entangled, is generally difficult to last long.
True love is uncontrollable. It is love, care and heartache, not submission, pity and charity.
when a man treats his feelings, he will give everything to himself if he loves you, and everything can be paid for you. It's not that he doesn't know how to love, but because it's not you who loves you.
Women in love, to maintain their own bottom line and dignity, the hard-begged love, the other party will not cherish.
this relationship is comfortable only if we love you willingly and treat you sincerely.
ask for money
asking a man for money is the beginning of destroying a woman's dignity!
when I watched the Battle of Love, I was particularly impressed.
the female guest is very beautiful, her boyfriend is considerate to her, and when they are madly in love, her boyfriend promises to support her for the rest of her life.
the female guests feel that they can still be supported without work, so they might as well be unemployed and stay at home.
slowly, her boyfriend's attitude changed and the amount of money he called her unconsciously shrank.
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every time you ask your boyfriend for money, you will be resented: "what did you buy when you spent it again?"
"isn't it right to ask you for money when you said you were the one who raised me?"
the female guest felt aggrieved and pulled her boyfriend on the show to let everyone comment.
as a result, her boyfriend confronted her with a straight face without leaving a trace of affection. Finally, I would like to say, "if I say to support you, you can't really rely on me to support you. You'll be gluttonous and lazy all day."
Yi Shu has a saying in Chenghuan Ji: "it is impossible to rely on others in life and hope to be respected by others."
when a man loves you, he will take the initiative to spend money for you, and he will be afraid that you have no money to be wronged, but if you ask him for it more times, he will resent it.
money, exceptUnless someone else gives it on his own initiative, otherwise he will reach out and spend it less happily.
"I raise you" is just a polite remark from most men. Just listen to it. You are really stupid.
A smart woman will not ask a man for money, she will rely on her own ability to make money, not humble, do not beg, live a strong life, marriage is freer!
"I just want him to spend more time with me, why is it too clingy in his mouth?" A cold message came from my friend.
I thought about it and replied to her: active companionship is a confession of long-term love, and what you are going to come here will only be perfunctory.
the problem of a friend actually indicates that a relationship is slowly cooling and snubbing.
after all, when most people start a relationship, who doesn't want to stick together all day?
when the other person is no longer trying to meet you as before, it means he doesn't like you so much.
writer Su Cen once said:
"the most extravagant person in the world is the one who spends time with you. Everyone's time is valuable. To share your time with you is to give you your own world. "
those who are willing to spend time with you and guard you may not all be sincere, but those who do not want to accompany you will certainly pay no attention to you.
if you are no longer interesting and ask him to accompany you, it will only make the other person feel that you can't live without him, and he will be more fearless.
Women should understand that whether a man is sincere or perfunctory to you does not depend on how much he says sweet words, but on how much he is willing to pay for you and how much he is willing to give you.
those who always use busyness as an excuse, just because they no longer love or don't love enough, so they don't have to care about your feelings.
in a sexual relationship, if the other person takes the initiative to spend time with you, at least it shows that he or she is attentive to you and needs the company you ask for, and there won't be a big surprise if you get it.
in a relationship, a lonely and brave effort will not last long, and unrestrained demands will only make love wear away slowly.
you can never look back without hitting the wall, but you must never lose your dignity and bottom line for love.
the love to come, the money to come, the companionship to come, like the details reminded, are not only cheap, but also belittled.
the heart that is given voluntarily is the true heart; the love that is given voluntarily is the true love; and the love that is given voluntarily is the true love.
, may you have the blessing of being a princess and the courage to be yourself, neither humble nor arrogant, free and independent!