Because there is love, you have to say it well.
language is like a double-edged sword, which can not only make people, but also hurt people.
what really destroys a family is often not infidelity or poverty, but verbal violence!
although verbal violence will not leave scars on the body, it will cast a lingering shadow on the heart, and even destroy a person's life.
one word is enough to destroy a person!
there is a problem with Zhihu:
what kind of experience is it for a person with a knife mouth and a bean curd heart around him?
one of them replied:
"people who are not afraid of knives have a tofu heart, but they are afraid that it is a hard piece of frozen tofu that will kill people."
think about it.
people who really have a "tofu heart" can't say anything that can hurt people!
in a variety show, the host asked, "what happened when you were most devastated?"
the female guest said without even thinking: "maybe he said 'get out' to me."
very often, an angry word and an unintentional accusation are irrelevant to the speaker, but the hearts of the listeners are half cold.
language is energetic because people are emotional.
A kind word makes people feel like a spring breeze, like a trickle deeply rooted in the hearts of the people.
hurtful words, like a sharp blade, make you angry, and it's easy to get into negative emotions.
Yu Qiuyu said: "caution in words is the first important thing to cultivate yourself."
often one word can make people laugh, and one word can make people jump.
if you want to break a man, one word is enough.
if this is said from the closest population, the harm is unparalleled.
how many marriages have died of verbal violence?
people often ask: "Why are we always so kind to strangers and cruel words to loved ones?"
in fact, people who love each other can not speak well, mostly do not understand, language is not for discussion and advice, but for sharing.
when two people are first together, they can't help but share a little thing with each other.
and after getting married, we have to discuss many problems with each other, but sometimes if we try too hard, we will turn into bad words.
host Kou Naixin once said such a thing on the program:
they both have strong personalities and usually don't give way to each other.
once, Kou Naixin was so angry that he decided to choose his most painful speech:
"Huang Guolun, what on earth is worthy of me, Kou Naixin? do you know that you have been divorced, that you are secondhand, and that you are not worthy of me?
Huang Guolun froze. He said:
"Nai Xin, there are some things that can't be said, do you know?
and then left.
she said that as a host, talking is her job, but it has also become her weapon.
"the two men I love most in my life, one is my father and the other is my husband, but the most vicious things I have ever said in my life are also used against these two men."
We lose our temper with people close to us unscrupulously, but we subconsciously know that they will not leave us.
but forget that it is not the last straw that kills the camel, but every one.
A pair of shoes can grind their feet, not to mention a living person.
husband and wife are the closest people. They are supposed to know the cold and know the hot and cold, and love each other, but they turn words into weapons to hurt each other. Although they have become addicted to their mouths, they hurt each other's feelings.
this is tantamount to planting an irregular "bomb" for an originally happy marriage.
as William Bernard said in the Harvard Family motto:
"Don't think they won't mind, just like hammering a nail into a fence, the injury will leave a permanent mark."
and the more intimate people are, the harder it is to heal.
so, if you love someone, please speak well, because this is the most important thing in marriage.
only by keeping your mouth shut can you stabilize this family.
your mouth is full of love, but your face is ferocious
the killer who destroys a child's life is not the game or playfulness, but the "verbal violence" of the parents.
Safekids, a global organization for child safety, has released such a poster.
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the child timidly held a 26-point examination paper, shrinking slightly, the corners of his eyes drooping and his face nervous.
is engraved with what his parents said to him:
did you let the pig eat your brain? With such an exam, how dare you go home?
the child accidentally broke the vase and looked at the adult's eyes carefully.
parents' unpleasant words, as usual:
being careless every day, you were a troublemaker in your last life? It's too bad to have you at home!
when the child just came back from playing football with his partner, the smile on the corner of his mouth gradually disappeared when he saw his parents.
as expected, the parents scolded in the face:
I have never seen such a dirty child. Did you pick it up from the garbage?
the author carves the parents' words on the child's body, which is as shocking as a scar.
although most parents really love their children, they often love their children ferociously.
We all know that although the weight is small, it can weigh a thousand jin. "
isn't the language violence of parents a weight in the hearts of their children?
the pain caused by this kind of injury cannot be erased after a long time.
like the Thai father who hated iron, he was so angry that he gave his child a loaded gun.
unexpectedly, the child really picked up a pistol and pointed it at his temple.
the father was heartbroken and howled, but he could no longer save the child's life.
We all know that language is a double-edged sword, so why aim the sharpest side at your favorite child?
parents should always remember that they were once a child.
therefore, we should understand them from the children's point of view and be their bosom friends in order to better communicate with them.
fairy tale king Zheng Yuanjie also said:
"the killer mace of completely destroying a child is to insult him in front of outsiders, demote him, and put him to shame."
never underestimate the impact of parents' words on a child's life.
good parents have a zipper on their lips and know what to say and what not to say to their children.
the lucky man cures his whole life with his childhood, and the unfortunate man his whole life.
Family and talents are prosperous in everything
what is the most important thing for a family?
do you live a noble life of luxury, or do you have inexhaustible money?
when a family is together, peace, health and harmony are more important than anything else!
A harmonious family does not quarrel, but no matter how much it quarrels, it will not speak harshly to the most important people in life.
because you don't know what the consequences of this sentence will be.
there is a kicking cat effect in psychology.
it is about a father who got angry at the company and scolded his child when he got home. The child was so angry that he kicked the cat next to him.
the cat escaped into the street when a truck was coming, and the driver was dodging and hurt a child.
under the double pressure of life and work, people will inevitably have a bad mood and often choose their words.
if the family fights with each other every day, scolds each other, blames each other and picks bones in the eggs, in the long run, the family will fall apart.
if every member of the family is smiling and thinking about each other, the family will be surrounded by laughter.
as "Caigen Tan" said: "such as the spring breeze thawing, such as harmonious ice, is the model of the family."
determines whether a family is happy or not, not by poverty or wealth, not by health or disease, but by the attitude and temper we show to our family.
when you can't control your aggressive mouth, put yourself in the other person's shoes.
A happy family is not without edges and corners, but someone is willing to polish it with love.
because there is love, you should say every word well.
encourage each other.