One after another disturbs the world, fighting for nothing.
listen to the main
sow the forest and read quietly
Laozi said, "the way of the world is good at winning without striving."
the more you argue, the more you lose, the more tired your heart is.
in life, the more you fight for something, the more you will lose.
fight for right or wrong with your lover
win reason, lose affection
the more a couple get along with each other, the more they quarrel, the more they refuse to make concessions, and the more indifferent they end up feeling.
A famous psychologist and his wife reconcile their conflicts by constantly NG.
one day, he dragged his tired body home from work. When he came home, he found his house in a mess and couldn't help complaining about his wife.
"it's so messy at home. You've been at home all day. Why didn't you tidy it up?"
the wife did not show weakness, but said plausibly:
"A lot of things are yours. Why don't you organize them yourself?"
so the two men argued with reason, and the quarrel became more and more serious.
suddenly, the psychologist realized that there was something wrong with his attitude, stopped and said:
"No, NG, let's do it again."
then put on your clothes, pick up your bag, go out of the house, tidy up your mood, and walk into the house again.
at this time, the wife also responded with a smile on her face: "I'm great. How are you today?"
A family conflict is so cleverly resolved.
when husband and wife get along, the relationship is never right or wrong, only the depth.
A quarrel begins to wear away patience, but patience wears away, and then slowly wears away love.
when love fades away, the marriage will come to an end.
if you reason with your lover, you will only talk about your feelings more and more. In the end, you win the truth and lose your feelings.
husband and wife should be more emotional and less reasonable when they get along with each other.
only in this way can the relationship between husband and wife become more and more harmonious and life become happier and happier.
compete with parents
win a while and lose a lifetime
the story of the writer Mai Jia and his father has always made people feel sorry for each other.
when he was 12 years old, his classmates insulted his father, and the Mai family wrestled with their classmates.
as a result, the father, who heard the news, gave two slaps in the face indiscriminately, and Mai's nostrils were filled with blood.
from that day on, the Mai family held a grudge against their father, and for 17 years after that, they did not want to talk to him again.
he studies hard to leave his father; he only writes to his mother to get back at his father.
the job has been transferred to more than a dozen cities, and the Mai family has never returned to their hometown and never thought of meeting their father.
until later, the Mai family became a father, and because of his son's rebellion, he gradually understood his father.
however, when he returned to his hometown, his father suffered from amnesia and no longer knew him.
"after you fall ill, I am very afraid of your death. I want to atone for my sins and make up for my mistakes. I owe you so much. I'll pay you back. "
after his father's death, the Mai family often read their works at his father's grave, trying to get his father's understanding in this way.
later, on the stage of the Reader, the Mai family was moved to tears and said:
"Father, you have given me a lot all your life.
I want one last point. I want a sober smile, a definite approval, a comfort, a forgiveness, a father-son affectionate hug.
but you didn't, Father. You just left. "
Home is the last place to compete.
wrestling with parents, refusing to bow their heads or understanding, in the end, it will only make the family more and more indifferent.
the end result is that when you wake up and look back, only to find that your parents are gone.
Family affection is the most unbearable to wait, do not wait to lose, only to find that it is too late.
compete with friends
win face and lose Li
netizens of Zhihu
@ White Code
told a story.
netizens and college roommates apply for employment in the same company, and the two also rent together in private.
netizens work very hard and are still studying after work.
because of their well-off family, roommates spend more time playing games and browsing short videos after work.
soon, there was a great disparity in the strength of the two.
because of their outstanding ability, netizens were promoted to project manager directly because of their outstanding performance in several projects.
at this time, roommates showed jealousy and dissatisfaction, often teasing netizens openly and secretly.
considering the old love, netizens are silent and turn a blind eye.
the more the netizens swallow their anger, the more their roommates get worse.
the contradiction between the two people is getting deeper and deeper, the gap between them is getting bigger and bigger, and finally the netizens move out.
later, the roommate also changed jobs and left the company, deleting all contact information of netizens before leaving.
too many friendships in life are destroyed by one dispute, and you want to be superior to others in everything.Have a better life than their friends.
not only drifting away from friends, but also making yourself worse and worse under jealousy.
particularly agree with a sentence said on the Internet:
only by acknowledging the excellence of others can you go to excellence.
keep your posture flat, learn to appreciate friends from high places, and think of good people in order to meet a better self.
compete for interests with partners
win a small profit and lose the pattern
there is a theory in economics that there is no competition between buyers and sellers.
Competition always occurs between buyers and buyers, or between sellers and sellers.
the relationship between partners is like the relationship between buyers and sellers. Only by giving way to each other can we work together.
Lin Zhengjia, a builder, was very shrewd when he was young, and everyone in the industry knew it.
although he is very business-savvy and capable, he has worked hard for many years, but his career is still in the doldrums.
he is no less intelligent or diligent than others, but his career always feels unpopular.
Nothing can stand to be compared with cowgirl wedding dresses. Our huge collections of are better than the rest.
after calming down, he used 10,000 yuan as the start-up capital to return to the mall.
from grocery stores to cement factories, from contractors to builders, partners flocked to have a smooth journey.
in fact, the secret of Lin Cheng's success is extremely simple, that is, when working with partners, he insists on getting two points less.
if you get two points less, it means that the other person can get two more points, and when the other person has money, he is more willing to cooperate with him.
many people cooperate, haggle over pennies, and deliberately want benefits, but in the long run, they will only lose the pattern and lose more interests.
willing to give way to profits, let the other side benefit, there is a big pattern, but will bring greater benefits to themselves.
in the face of interests, everyone has selfishness, and everyone is eager to get the best interests.
but really smart people are often good at losing rather than taking advantage, and there are often more opportunities behind the losses.
disturb the world one after another, fighting for nothing.
if you argue with your lover, you will lose your affection; if you argue with your parents, you will lose your affection.
if you argue with your friends, you will lose your friendship; if you argue with your partners, you will lose your interests.
whoever you argue with, you win, you lose.